Man, I'm one down little girl this week. It started Sunday when I got to church and discovered the topic was marriage. My favorite topic while sitting completely alone in church. I don't think it would have been so bad if I even had a friend to sit by but Nathan won't sit next to me. I think he thinks people will think we're dating. Did that make sense? So I cried during church and then this creepy guy sat next to me and was so shy he turned his back to me when I reached out to shake his hand and say good morning.
I painted Monday and did some scrapbooking. It was better than eating everything in my house which is what I wanted to do. I was pleased with the results and amazed by that evening's episode of 24. The best show ever.
Tuesday was rough and has carried over into today. I'm trying to separate myself from my situation, evaluate and analyze. Maybe that's my problem. Oh, by the way, I spilled my guts to Blue Eyes. I guess I can call him Danny now because he knows how I feel...Only now I wish I hadn't done it. I could've ruined a great friendship. T, is it really worth it in the end? Hurting that much?
I know God is always with me and I'm actually never alone but you've probably felt alone like I have. Is it because I'm human and don't fully get it? I wish I had some physical aspect of God to show me His love today. Maybe it's in creation or it'll be in some middle schooler who gives me a hug tonight. I just don't think I'll be satisfied with that. Why am I such a brat?
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